What is Overcontrol?

Overcontrolled (OC) personality is a pattern of behavior characterized by excessive self-discipline, emotional restraint, and a rigid adherence to rules or standards. Individuals who identify as OC tend to suppress their feelings and may struggle with perfectionism, fear of making mistakes, and an overwhelming need for control in various aspects of their lives. While these traits can sometimes be strengths, an over reliance on them often leads to significant stress, anxiety, and a sense of inner turmoil, particularly when these tendencies hinder relationships or overall well-being.

Key Characteristics of Overcontrolled Personality

• Emotional Suppression: Difficulty expressing emotions openly and vulnerably or inhibiting emotion expression. 

• Perfectionism: An intense need to do things "perfectly," to avoid criticism from self or others. There can also be a fear of failure or imperfection. 

• Excessive Self-Discipline: A tendency to overwork and over-schedule in an effort to stay in control of one’s environment.

• Difficulty in Relationships: Struggles with meaningful connection, as emotional vulnerability and spontaneity may feel threatening or uncomfortable.

• Rigid Thinking and Behavior: A tendency to see situations in black-and-white terms, with little room for flexibility or compromise.

What causes an Overcontrolled personality?

Excessive self control is a perfect combination of biology (bio-temperament), life experiences (environment) and coping style.

Bio-temperament: relates to the genetic and biological conductors of emotional perception and regulation of the world around you. How we perceive threat, safety, or reward can happen in milliseconds at the pre-conscious level. Those with an overcontrolled personality tend to have a bio-temperament that includes increased sensitivity to threat, increased ability to inhibit emotions, high attention to detail and low levels of a sense of reward.

Environment: Life experiences that exacerbate an overcontrolled personality could include traumatic events but doesn’t have to. It could also include environments that sent the message that self control is imperative, mistakes are unacceptable or intolerable, winning or appearances are important, and weaknesses (often emotions) should not be revealed.

Overcontrolled Coping Style: the result of bio-temperament and environment coming together. This could look like masking inner feelings, people pleasing or perfectionism to avoid criticism or conflict, compulsive striving (and often high achievements, yet nothing feels “enough”), avoidance of unplanned risks (trying to predict and plan for every scenario), extreme toleration of distress (pushing down pain), and an aloof and distant style of relating (avoidance of connection or relationships).